Siriusly, It's a Wonderful Life
by stmpunklizzie
Summary: After watching It's a Wonderful Life for the 1millionth time I decided to give it a HP makeover. Set towards the end of Mr. Black's stay in Azkaban, he is about ready to give it all up. It may have been better had he never been born...


It's a Wonderful Life

-If you have never seen the classic Christmas story "It's a Wonderful Life" with Jimmy Stewart, you should. It's corny, over-exploited, but it is a very good tale of how each one of us has our parts to play in this life. We are all important. So read on, if I haven't already put you to sleep, and have a happy holiday season where ever you may be.

-I don't own Sirius, I don't own anything HP related, I don't own anyone or anything related to Jimmy Stewart or the movie "It's a Wonderful Life" I don't even own a copy of the movie (I just watch it 20 times on TV during the holiday season) I am not trying to make money by sharing this story. Got it? Get it? Good.

- For those of you who know my quirks about numbers…this one will be 3 chapters.

Chapter 1: The delusion

He hit the cold wall of the prison and collapsed into a dirty heap on the floor. The torture had been acute this time and he shook at the thought of it, so fresh in his foggy brain. Although exhausted, Sirius gathered up all of his remaining strength to change into a shaggy black dog. The Dementors wouldn't detect him quite as easily this way, giving him a chance to rest and regain his strength. Every time he survived another of their interrogations, he wondered if he would make it to the next. Having lost count of the time that passed, it was impossible to know exactly how long he had been in Azkaban; but he guessed it had been at least 10 years if not more. Despair crept into his soul as he heard the other prisoners howl and moan insanely. He would never escape, never see James and Lily avenged, never see Harry grow up, never help Remus through another full moon, never see the love of his life again. Why was he still holding on?

Padfoot curled himself tightly, whimpering at the pain, trying to get some warmth under his fur. But the warmth never came and he began to shiver on the cold damp ground. His mind brought back the horrible images that the Dementors had whipped him with. James with a cruel look, telling him he would be alive if it weren't for Sirius. _Why did YOU convince me to take Peter as my secret keeper? _he would taunt. Then Lily came, soft at first, looking as if she would forgive him. Just as he would reach for her, she would curse him, yelling the same word over and over, _Why? _Remus would come and berate him, Peter would arrive and tease him. It was always the same, and Padfoot wept at the overwhelming pain of it all.

_I wish I had never been born, _he thought. _I wish I had never been born!_ James and Lily would still be alive, he was sure of it. Harry would have his parents. Lifting his head he howled mournfully into the inky darkness of the prison. Exhausted, hurt and alone, he let the misery wash over him as he fell into a nightmare of sleep.

"Sirius?" He didn't want to wake up. For the first time in years he was warm and comfortable. "Sirius. It's time to go." Slowly opening one eyes, Sirius blinked rapidly against the bright light that shone into them. _Sunlight?_ He thought drowsily. _Either I am dead or this is a trick, _his brain warned.

"Sirius Black! Get up NOW!" the voice that had lulled him from his sleep now boomed in his ear and Sirius shot up, his heart pounding hard. Squinting in the light, he slowly focused on a tall, thin figure that reminded him of Dumbledore.

"Albus?" Sirius coughed, his throat raw. "What are we doing here?"

"I do apologize for yelling, yet I am not who you have mistaken me for." Sirius stood, his eyes finally adjusting to the light.

"Then, who…where are we at?" He was beginning to be wary of the stranger, having experienced too many moments of false assurances before being beaten back down.

"It seems you have lost your will to go on son." The stranger replied kindly. Sirius looked at him skeptically.

"Why would you care?"

"I care very much! You are just as important as everyone else. Even more so to me. You have a life to finish!" Sirius narrowed his eyes at the old man, his anger rising. Not only had he refused to tell him who he was, but now he was trying to build his confidence? Something was up.

"Listen, whatever you have planned, have at it. I don't care how much you beat me or steal into my mind. I am done. I believe you ok?" Sirius stepped forward and stuck his finger at the man's little nose, "You won. It would have been better if I hadn't been born!" At this, the man's face fell. He looked sadly at Sirius and shook his head.

"I am sorry I hadn't come sooner. I didn't know it had gotten this bad for you son. But then again, you have to hit bottom before things can get better!" His smile had returned and Sirius wanted to punch it off of his face.

"Uh-uh! No violence! It wouldn't be very grateful of you now would it?" Sirius took a step back, his mind racing. He must be a Dementor to know his thoughts, this was all going to come crashing around him at any moment. "Really, you need to relax. I am here to grant your wish!" Sirius laughed darkly.

"My wish? Great! Ok, I would like a large steak, medium well and some…" Sirius paused as the old man started to laugh.

"No no no…your wish was already made!"

"What?"

"You wished you had never been born. I am going to show you what things would be like if you hadn't been around. But we really must get going. It was hard to get you awake and we have wasted too much time here." He chuckled, reaching out for Sirius' arm. "You always were hard to wake up. Even as a boy I had to shake you for breakfast in the morning when you would visit…" Sirius let his mouth fall open as he realized who was standing in front of him.

"Uncle Alphard?" the old man nodded simply, as if it was the easiest thing in the world to figure out. "This has to be a trick…" Alphard looked into his nephews eyes and smiled sadly.

"I know this has to be hard, seeing where I pulled you from, but really son, we have to go. After I have shone you what I need to, you can decide if you want to go back or move on with me."

"Go back? To Azkaban? Why even waste the time, let's just go on now!" Sirius shook his head in disbelief.

"Because my dear boy, you need to make the choice after you have _all_ the facts. If you choose to come with me in the end, it will be like you never existed. You need to see that world before you can make your choice." Sirius looked at his uncle with doubt in his eyes, still unsure if everything was as it seemed. Sighing, he shrugged his shoulders and smiled for the first time in ages.

"If this is real, I promise you, NOTHING will convince me to go back to that hell." Alphard smiled and winked at Sirius.

"We shall see boy, we shall see."


End file.
